17 January it was. JEE advanced mock test. 18 questions each, physics, chemistry and mathematics. The paper was 500 times tougher than the actual exam. Bring me a genius who could solve the complete paper in the time duration, without any mistakes and I’m ready to give him all the property I own, offer valid till 7th November 2027. No other Terms and conditions applied. Seeing the number of people writing the exam, the invigilator also left, for he knew we are all hopeless and helpless; telling us to handover the papers to A after completion.
Shubh (UP wale bhaiya, prankster for blogger buddies who have read Valentine’s day aka April Fool’s day ) abused the world, our lives, the life of every damn person who chose science and the paper for 3 hours. I’m a little old school, literally 😂. I kept chanting 108 names of lord Krishna so that I pass this one. Only our reactions were noteworthy. Others either slept or took the paper and walked away. Some lied to themselves that the paper where questions were in Latin was simple. Their results proved they lied.
So me, Shubh and 2 other survivors came out after three hours. Suneeta aunty was waiting for us outside. Me and shubh looked at eachother, and mutually decided to ignore Suneeta aunty.
“Bete, I’m here. How was the paper?”
Shubh couldn’t control; “***** faadu tha aunty! B*******d ney zindagi jhaand kar di Teri ********”
I’m trying to hold her as she’s fainting. Shubh left.
It was my turn to answer. “Aunty it was bad”
Schadenfreude guys. Quoting google, “pleasure derived by someone from another person’s misfortune”. Suneeta aunty couldn’t conceal her happiness. She said: ” Bad?!!?! It has to be bad. It always has to be bad. Only then it can be good.” Okay lady be happy. Just stay out of my way right now.
I didn’t say anything and I went to the first floor. I was standing near the staircase trying to recall all my sins. I remember I had killed English in childhood when I said “Oh! I didn’t knew only”. I had also behaved very badly with mom today. I had refused to get water for my brother when he was tired and the bedardi me had also slapped a dog once, literally slapped a dog three years ago!
Meanwhile on the second floor, Suneeta aunty’s daughter, an AIIMS aspirant came out of the exam hall. “How was your exam Natasha?”
“Maa, pathetic! I didn’t know anything in physics!”
I was eavesdropping on the first floor. Sins after sins. Joblessness at 8 p.m.
“What do you mean by pathetic? Didn’t you study?”
“Maa, the paper was tough. I promise I’ll work hard and do well in the actual exam”
“When you cannot pass a normal xyz institute exam, how will you clear AIIMS?. I’ve made khichdi at home, and you start solving HC Verma. Minty has that book, I saw it today ”
“But maa, Minty is a JEE aspirant, not AIIMS”
“Toh? So what?”
And I finally smiled that day! Equations change. Don’t they? 🙂